What’s the appropriate way to ask for a divorce?

There could come a point in your marriage when you believe that divorce is the only answer. If this happens, you need to review your marriage, the divorce process and what the future will bring should you go down this path.

While there is no right or wrong way to ask for a divorce, there are steps you can take to reduce tension and put yourself on the path to working through the process in an efficient manner. Here are a few tips you can follow:

• Be honest: Don’t beat around the bush or give your spouse the idea that you’re willing to work things out. If you know that divorce is best for you, lay out your true feelings and honestly answer any questions to the best of your ability.
• Choose the right time and place: This is important to having a meaningful conversation, as you want to have enough time to share your feelings and hear out your spouse. Also, choosing the right place gives you both comfort in your ability to openly share your feelings.
• Protect yourself: You may have reason to believe that your spouse could become extremely upset, even physically abusive, if you bring up the topic of divorce. This should alter your approach, such as by asking for a divorce in a public place or via phone.
• Don’t discuss the details of the divorce process: You’re anxious to work through things such as property and debt division, child custody and child support, but if you tackle these details during the initial conversation it’s likely to end in an argument.
• Talk about next steps: Stick to the basics, such as where both individuals will live and how you want to address the topic with your children. The both of you have to take a responsible approach to the next steps, especially if children are involved.

There are things you should and shouldn’t do when asking for a divorce, and these tips will give you the guidance you need to make informed decisions.

Once your spouse knows your feelings, you can take the first step in filing for divorce. It’s never easy, but there are moves you can make to keep your stress in check.